Adversity is like a strong wind. I don't mean that it holds us back from places we might otherwise go, It also tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that afterward we see ourselves as we really are, and not merely as we might like to be. One woman for example, suffered the death of her husband during a war and afterward poured herself into 2 things: caring for her little boy and sewing which provided her with income. She seemed to live for nothing else. When she grew thinnner and thinner, you knew where every gram of her was going. She clutched at that child as though he were the cliff's edge that kept her from falling to the rocks below.Because I'd lived through adversity once before, what I learned about myself was like a reminder of something I'd once known but had nearly forgotten- namely, beneath the elegant clothing, and the accomplishments, and the clever conversation, my life had no complexity at all, but was as simple as a stone falling toward the ground. My whole purpose in everything during the past 7 years had been to win someone's turst and possibly-if I could- their affection. Then I came to a realization, more painful in some ways than actual physical pain I once endured. I'd spent the previous night nursing a troubling thought, wondering for the first time what might happen if I reached the end of my life and still this person had never taken any notice of my efforts to strengthen this mother-nature "bond" that's meant to be shared between us. I looked for some sign-any sign- in the hopes of finding something to give me hope that I haven't lived my life without purpose. I was feeling so dejected. I was soo pre-occupied with the search of the "sign" that I almost got run down by a truck the next morning. From this experience I understood the danger of focusing only on what isn't there. What if I came to the end of my life and realized that I'd spent every day watching for the smallest gesture of care toawrds me that would never come to me?? What an unbearable sorrow it would be, to realize I'd never really tasted the things I'd eaten, or seen the places I'd been, because I thought of nothing but this person even when my life was drifting away from me, what life would I have?I would be like a dancer who had practiced since childhood for a performance she would never give.